23 October 2009

Forgive me I am so imperfect


When I come home today I wish to find the door latched from inside, because when I ring the doorbell I wish to see you open the door for me with a smile. I don’t mind even if you come rubbing sleep of your eyes.
Everyday I walk in without your notice and you even don’t care when I have come. Sometimes I disgust you when I walk into our room disturbing your sweet nap with my strong footfall. Yet upon waking, you pull your blanket still further and sleep for little longer. I have just begun my marriage and expect grander romance out of it, if not as much as I saw in “Message in the Bottle” or read in “Note Book”. I am beginning to feel like an old man already.
Sometimes I walk in with dust on my shoes, you have no idea how I try to be careful about this but somehow it keeps slipping my mind, and that spoils your mood altogether. Sorry won’t work on you, so I even give my hand in cleaning it but your mood never seems to come back. Thus a dust on my shoe ruins a family’s evening. Evening after evening for silly matters like a “dust on my shoe” as long as sorry doesn’t work...
There are many other important things that I keep forgetting. Forgetting has become a part of me now, I don’t like it myself either. I want to remember everything in their finest detail but what to do my mind is overloaded with matters of four different subjects of six different classes with 200 different students each day from morning to evening in the school. That’s just one of ten parts of work I do in the school. So forgive me if I forget things, I promise I will no more forget our car in the school and come home walking. Please accept that I am imperfect just as anybody.
In all my waking moments I let the fibers of my life dance to the flute of your will, but forgive me if the dance sometimes is not perfect. Don’t let it kindle the flame of your anger that may burn down our home. In rage you throw and break things, which I forgive you but god may not, we may repair or replace the broken things but we cannot buy back the luck you smashed with some cherished things.
 Yet at the end of it all, when the calm befalls the fury I forgive you and that’s when I wish if you could accept my imperfection just as I agree with yours.

3 comments:

  1. Written in good humor and therefore should be read in good humor, for I don't want another war anywhere.

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  2. Wai, PaSsu I only hope and pray everything is fine with you on all fronts. But if it is written in good humor, I understand. I cannot but agree with you totally on this imperfection part of us. But a little effort in trying to cope up with differences will go a long way in making our married lives much more plesant and meaningful, I guess.

    All the best PaSsu. Give me a call. I wanna talk to you about something.

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  3. Whew, this was a bit disturbing. Trust alls good with you man. But I take it that you just wrote it in good humor and doesn't necessarily reflect your personal life.

    I think it's natural to have small wars to bring a family closer. But never drop the atom bomb! :)

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