I asked this question to myself again on 15th December 2013, when I watched the heart breaking documentary of His Majesty the Fourth King during 2003 war in the south? It pained me so much to see our beloved king so dejected as he spoke to the brave army then. Every word his majesty spoke seemed to break a piece of me. I was melting with shame and guilt in front of the TV screen. I felt like spitting on myself.
|Our beloved king|
In 2003 I was selected into teaching and was deployed as apprentice teacher to Haa. Upon reaching my home front with all the happiness in the world, I was shattered when I was sent to Sombaykha, a good four days walk from Haa and way off from where I wanted to be. After about 10 months in isolation, on December 17 morning in 2003 we declared the students' results and on the eve of homecoming we heard on radio about the victory over insurgents in the south.
This, I know, cannot justify anything now but as I write this I feel a strong sense of relieve and courage to forgive myself. Tomorrow when I pass Dochula and see the 108 chortens I will be less guilty... but still guilty. I know time will still spit on us.