Forgive me I am so imperfect

When I come home today I wish to find the door latched from inside, because when I ring the doorbell I wish to see you open the door for me with a smile. I don’t mind even if you come rubbing sleep of your eyes.

Everyday I walk in without your notice and you even don’t care when I have come. Sometimes I disgust you when I walk into our room disturbing your sweet nap with my strong footfall. Yet upon waking, you pull your blanket still further and sleep for little longer. I have just begun my marriage and expect grander romance out of it, if not as much as I saw in “Message in the Bottle” or read in “Note Book”. I am beginning to feel like an old man already.

Sometimes I walk in with dust on my shoes, you have no idea how I try to be careful about this but somehow it keeps slipping my mind, and that spoils your mood altogether. Sorry won’t work on you, so I even give my hand in cleaning it but your mood never seems to come back. Thus a dust on my shoe ruins a family’s evening. Evening after evening for silly matters like a “dust on my shoe” as long as sorry doesn’t work...

There are many other important things that I keep forgetting. Forgetting has become a part of me now, I don’t like it myself either. I want to remember everything in their finest detail but what to do my mind is overloaded with matters of four different subjects of six different classes with 200 different students each day from morning to evening in the school. That’s just one of ten parts of work I do in the school. So forgive me if I forget things, I promise I will no more forget our car in the school and come home walking. Please accept that I am imperfect just as anybody.

In all my waking moments I let the fibers of my life dance to the flute of your will, but forgive me if the dance sometimes is not perfect. Don’t let it kindle the flame of your anger that may burn down our home. In rage you throw and break things, which I forgive you but god may not, we may repair or replace the broken things but we cannot buy back the luck you smashed with some cherished things.

 Yet at the end of it all, when the calm befalls the fury I forgive you and that’s when I wish if you could accept my imperfection just as I agree with yours.

A Very Rare Wang in Wangdue- bless yourself

People say this Wang is once-in-a-life chance. His holiness the late Je Daden Rinchen has passed on this blessing to the present lam Neten of the Wangdue Dzong, thus it is said that only he can give this wang.


Such public gathering always excites me, I love to take my family out into the crowd and let them feel the energy. Of course it was difficult for my wife to wear kira on her eighth-month belly. Thought of having to take her among the wild Bhutanese crowd scared me. However, it was not so bad. We avoided the crowd. 


I couldn't help watching the human drama of greed in the courtyard of the Wangdue Dzong where people have come to connect themselves with god. Everybody wants to be in the frontline, everybody like to keep in the shade, everybody wants to have the blessing first, and everybody wants bundles of soonkeys. At the end of the day, true blessing is what we feel deep within ourselves; no one can bless you more than yourself. The guilt-free self is the greatest blessing.

Are we ready for the Coldest Winter ever?

I know anybody would ask, “Who said this winter will be the coldest?” The simple answer is who said the whole country would be flooded last summer? Who said country would be hit by a destructive earthquake ever? Who said it would be followed by windstorm?

Nobody has to say anything on this matter. This chain of things will keep happening now. It’s called the weather change, and our country can do nothing about it, we can just wait and suffer the different blows from nature. If all the countries in the world have been simple like ours then perhaps we would not have to face this natural calamities now. But the big countries with big desires provoke the instinct of the wild nature. Those countries are suffering year after year but why us? Whom to question at?

We better prepare to face different calamities now. Imagine heavy snowfall in Phuntsholing; are we ready to face it? Imagine months of road block due to snowfall; do we have enough food in stock? Imagine an avalanche from Sangaygang do we have a rescue team yet?

A slap on the right cheek means that we should take care of the left cheek, unless you want to be someone like Gandhiji. The September 21 Earthquake cost Bhutan over 2000 million. With this much money we could have built a shield against all earthquakes ever.

The question I put was funny, I know, and more funny question is do we still want to continue offering butter lamp, and relieve works once everything is over or are we going to do something before the disaster strikes so that there won't be a need to light butter lamp at all? was it a question? It seemed like an answer.

Can’t wait to keep the promise

Over years I realized I was growing very quick. Many a morning I woke up wondering why I was doing what I was doing then. I regretted so many things I was doing that I often found myself slowly changing the course all together. It was not at all picnic having to start undoing things that had once been a part of me.

First was my anger. It was terrible. I was living with a devilish master and I didn’t know I was affecting people around me. If I had continued with that anger of mine today I would be all be myself. But I realized on time. People say it is very difficult to overcome it. I don’t remember facing difficulty because all I was doing was just not being angry when I feel like being. That’s when I realized how many people cared for me.

Then, it was my smoking habit. I don’t even remember how I quitted. Three years into the habit I was finding it funny; why am I taking smoke into my lungs when I very wisely know that it would do nothing more than bad on me? It was waste of time, money, health, and grace (most people think smoking is cool but in the eye of decent people it is erosion of character).

Drinking was interesting when bachelor. Once I started having family I looked like a fool, balancing myself on my feet when the rest of them are leaning on me. Nobody had to tell me anything, I just did what a responsible man should do.

Looking at my tattooed arm I might look like once-a-drug-addict but I swear I was a bad boy but not so bad as to take drug. I hate drugs. The reason I am growing wise and responsible is because I never used it at any point. If I had done it I might not have lived up to realize all these.

There were minute other things, which is fine even if not written.

Well I have finally given up this (one more) cheap habit of mine--chewing tobacco. After I quit smoking I picked this up. Everybody thinks this is a very filthy thing to do with my mouth. I often questioned myself and since it is so subtle I promised to leave it for a grand reason. I looked for reasons, something that would give me time enough yet. Then I thought perhaps I will leave it when my first book gets published. That sounded great to me, at least to would give me time to enjoy for quite sometime.

My memory is failing me now, my manuscript must be collecting dust on the publishers’ desk, and my lips are peeling and teeth and gum darkening. If I wait any longer I may not be left with lips to kiss my coming baby. I think I can’t wait to keep the promise. So for no special reason I stopped chewing tobacco, it is the fourth day now. Let the book get published years after, I have already kept the promise, for I couldn’t wait for a reason to do a good thing. Could there be a grander reason than the act of doing it?

Pictures used from Google. ( Picture 2 from http://www.ahajokes.com/fp043.html)

Why do we need a religion? why a new one?

How many of us Bhutanese are Buddhist? Strictly hardly any of us are. Do we care? NO! and this carelessness in us has kept our country at peace so far. The bloodiest wars on earth are fought in the name of religions, thank god we never really bothered to know what religion we are supposed to follow, forget about fighting a war.

Buddhism has deep root in Bhutanese history and it has won faith over centuries. Therefore when a child is born he is a Buddhist by birth. Though half understood and half manipulated in blind faith yet our religion is keeping us happy and at peace. And as long as we have that we are ready to call it our religion.

Of all the things in world religion should be the last thing to play round with, it's a matter of belief and faith and not something that could be thrust upon somebody with power or influence. Religion is of god and soul and all the good things that it should be the last thing to start a war. But what has happened so far everywhere?

We are the last country left, and we are changing- many new religions are breeding in the corners of our streets, and many people are working full time in spreading them. It's like forming gangs, who has the biggest gang has the most power to rule the streets. Buddhism is cool and tolerant and selfless, therefore we never had problems of any sort...now the religions known for wars are coming up in our street, and they are already showcasing groupism and the day is not far when we will have to see Holy Wars!

We don't want any New Religion in our country- STOP RELIGION, STOP WAR we will get nothing more than war and blood in the name of god ( actually it is not god, it is some crazy people doing all these stupid things)

Picture from Google: the ancient Buddha statue in rock before Taliban bombed it down. We didn't say anything. Buddhism is tolerant.

Freestyle Dance and Bhutanese kids

A dance format that has no format at all is called freestyle; even wearing a cap is a big step there, not to mention that any physical stunts you can do will be counted, regardless of whether they go with the beat. That's what I have seen so far in Bhutan- of course I have seen the true freestyle dance on TV and it's no where similar to the ones we see here.

Good thing about the dance is that it is very physical and engaging.and that any hyperactive kid can do it but the bad thing in it that the dance and dancers are everything but decent; from the way they keep their hair, to way they dress, to speak, to their gestures. All these must be normal elsewhere but Bhutan gets shocked. From so far as I have seen and know- beginning from my school- these very dancers are the kids who are least interested in studies and gets involved in troubles, not to mention smoking and doing drugs.

My son is one among these 'future of the country'. He comes home every day with a new step or a story of how people applauded on one of his steps in sheer excitement. He is very sharp though but I was not surprised when he failed in five subjects last summer. As far as the dancing goes I am happy he is one of the bests, but I fear he might lose himself among the rotten habits and never even come back to become what he deserves to be in life.

Last Saturday I went to his school variety show and much to my surprise there was no show if it weren't for his freestyle dance. Crowd went wild at his stunts and I for once thought he is so gifted. But the very next evening, I was at home, I got a call from his class teacher saying my son has broken his finger on the stage. That scared the breath out of me. My wife was almost crying, she felt that the teacher is lying and that the injury must be deadlier. We rushed to his school. Thank god it was only a finger and not his neck, which I know will be if he continues his dance.

Following is the freestyle dance my son performed in his school's Variety Show, the day before he broke his finger:

Blogging: the freedom of expression...

I am extremely pleased to read a full page coverage on the rising popularity of Bhutanese blogger in the "techno" page of Bhutan Times. Screen shots of four blogs are presented there and surprisingly all four of them are in my blog roll; why was I left out? Ha ha ha, just being funny. The story covers a lot of aspects through interviews with many blogger, some of them were blogging since 2007; it's sad they didn't know I was blogging since 2006 and not body called me up to get an interview.
The story is all pleasing and could draw new people into the techno-hobby. I didn't know Barack Obama was so positive about it but our opposition leader makes the best use of it to get public opinion on his views. Even companies with big websites are resorting to creating blog version of their websites to dash with the popularity of blogs.

The whole world is into it now, there is no greater gift of democracy. Bhutanese are finally learning to accept the gift from the Constitution of Kingdom of Bhutan- the freedom of expression, with clear vision of limit though. But the closing section of the article talks about "Regulating online content?" and I am shocked by some comments there, which are threatening to question the freedom of expression.

A moment from a birthday Party...

The aftershock of the Monday afternoon earthquake is still heavy in my heart; why are all four elements turning against us now? It began with the storm last year, then flood, now earthquake... something has gone terribly wrong somewhere and many of us know where!

Well forget that and look at this moment from a birthday party I attended on Thrul.

At least once a year every bhutanese would bathe

We nearly had Thrulbub slashed of our calendar, which would leave no guarantee that all the Bhutanese would bathe once every year. It was a pleasant surprise when I heard the announcement that this year government is declaring it back, realizing the importance of hygiene.
I was explaining to my Indian friend about the day and he thought I was joking when I said that on Thrul the rivers are all blessed and therefore cannot be consumed. I explained that since most of us are bathing for the first time in the year and all our yearlong savings go down to river...

I took my family for swimming. My wife won't swim and I can't therefore it was fun watching my brother and son drive in the half-filled swimming pool. I couldn't resist after sometime and gave in to my temptation. Lucky some kids have  come with tubes. However I could not come out of the pool without having one two gulps of the blessed water; kids spit and pee in there, oh so blessed. Today I am a sick man now.

Now I am Allowed to Drive My Own Car

Last Sunday saw me in extremely different colors. Even Saturday gave me a sleepless night. I have been driving for last four months, cross my fingers, I didn't give chance for even a scratch. Over this period I have traveled to Ha, Paro and Thimphu with full confidence. But with all the confidence in tact I still panicked over the idea of going for driving test.
Until I bought my car driving was almost alien to me. My cousins have cars, my uncles and aunties have too but for the unfortunate fact that my parents don't have I am deprived of even sitting in the driver's seat of their cars. I never thought I could drive someday.
Before I decided to buy my car I already registered for my learner license. I have to be six months old in possession of the learner license before I could sit for the test, but I was told that if the blue book (ha ha blue book is green) is registered in my name I could be considered for the test just in three months, but you know I have test phobia.
The last time I registered, it was about the right time in all sense; my learner license was six months old and I was more experienced. But experience on the road is nowhere similar to that in the stupid box; god knows why they are testing us in there. So last Saturday I drove to the same spot where they would test us and did my practice. It was not so bad after all. All I had to do was to memorize the marks in the box; where to stop, where to start turning, where so and so. I was told that it's impossible to pass the test in Santro but after my practice I disagreed.
Seeing me worried, my neighbor angay shared her piece of mind, "The car is yours and the road belongs to the country, why in the world do you have to sit for the test and pay for the permission to drive your own car?" How true! I began to ponder over it and it still sounded true. Will there be an answer to this question?
Sleepless Saturday and an appetite-less Sunday morning made me sick. My wife went with me as a lucky charm. I sat for the written test; I already got several questions from outside from those who already sat it. There were 20 multiple choice question of 40 marks of which 24 is the pass mark, in schools it would be 16. Well I think I scored cent percent because I opened the learner license and referred to it, I don't know if it is even allowed; nobody stopped me anyway.
Then came my turn to enter the box, I looked at my lucky charm and saw her more worried than me but she has counted on me since she saw me do well during the practice session. The front-in-front-out was done like a professional but the back-in-back-out nearly got me in trouble. I was drenched in sweat by the time I came out successfully. The whole Sunday I kept smiling, called up so many people of which my mother was the first.
So, from last Sunday I am given the permission to drive my own car, ha ha ha..

On My Brother Tenzin's Birthday...

We are unfortunate no more, we can celebrate birthdays now. There were times we thought birthday celebration was a luxury. I didn't even know my birthday until I was in high school; I did some maths then and found it out approximately. I have been in many of our cousins' birthday parties envying the lavish expenses and the gifts, but my birthday was often forgotten. I was never wished nor gifted on my birthday, which made me cry on every birthday I let go in hostels.
Today is your birthday; probably you did some maths too. You used to tell me that your birthday falls on 15th August; anyway it doesn't matter when. It has to be a day in the year which reminds us that a year has passed by. You took sweets for your friends in school and as you give them, greetings will rain on you. That's when you will realize how important you are. In hostel, I would hardly have money but I made sure I save enough to purchase a packet of sweet just to get some friends to greet me, for no one would otherwise remember.
This is the first years in our lives we have been together for the whole year. Thus we are together on my birthday and yours too for the first time. This inspires me to write a few lines in my online diary hoping you would learn about it some day. There are many things about you that I share with my friends, which I want to write here knowing someday you would read like a piece of legend.
 When you were born I was already eight and away from home. We were together only during the winters but to my surprise you could remember all the detail account from our childhood. You could remember many things from my childhood that I can't and that makes me feel that you have a better brain than mine.
You were a boy born with a stone in your hand. I wonder how you have done but so many neighbors came banging on our door because you have stoned their children. It is hard to keep track of you unless you cried. You roar when you cried drawing my attention and me. I have fought for you hundreds of times regardless of your faults.
But I still remember the day I fought a big guy who tossed me left and right, you were just about four and Samtey could be eight. When you knew I was losing you ran home crying with Samtey. By then I was crying too and still fighting with dozens of men watching in pleasure. I thought I was going to be killed if I don't run away, but my pride as a fighter held me back. Just then the two of you appeared, Samtey was with a kitchen knife and you were holding a spoon. The two of you were too tiny to scare him away but I felt so secure though I lost that fight.
Tenzin, people in our village hated you as much as they hated me. We have been naughty beyond limits and have been the don of playground in our own times, unlike Samtey who was good all along. During my reign of the playground I didn't cause damage to myself so much as you did to yourself during your rule. You fell from the veranda countless times, you fell from roof of the gate twice, and in both these incidents you bled so much causing lot of damage to your face. But the most damage was done when you jumped from one wall to another of a ruined house. You missed your step and hit your mouth on the other wall breaking four teeth along with the gum. We found two of your broken teeth from inside of your swollen lips. You looked very ugly and cute then. Your lips never regained it actual shape nor your tiny teeth. The four teeth in front were replaced by two big ugly teeth. That was no the end, I know you remember why your ring finger has that odd form; you have sliced it into two. After stitching the shape looked funny, I thought it would come back to normal with time but where? It really looks like a phallus.
Thank god you grew up so fast, a few more years and you would have distorted whole your physical form.
One thing that made me a better Acho is a story from our childhood too. You and Samten are home and I was away in hostel. When I return home on vacations two of you would always have something to give me, a new shirt or a sock or a pen that someone had given you. When I ask why you did not use them yourselves, you would say it doesn't matter to you in village and that I should have it since I go amidst new people in new places. I know how seldom we get to own new things in our childhood but two of you were always happy wearing the rags as long as I am well dressed. I still wonder how big a heart god has put into your tiny chests.
Now you are growing pimples and must be worried about it. It will disappear over time, don’t worry. But over time you have changed too; the hyperactive Tenzin is lost into a silent loner. I am worried you are missing the brighter side of boyhood. The intelligent Tenzin is lost into a careless and dull boy who gives excuses for failing in multiple subjects. I remember how you would solve mathematical problems from you finger tips and the smelly toes shown from you torn socks. Change is good but you have choices, be objective about the road you choose.
You quite well know me, I haven’t been the best of students either but I have always known my responsibility as brother and as a son. Though a young boy, I have seen appreciation in your eyes when I walked home with a TV set bought from my little apprentice salary, I have heard how you praised me to your friends when I brought how new sets of plates and mugs from my temporary job wages. Those were the times I struggled along with thousands in the job market; in such times people lose their nerve and do drugs and drink and try to be happy. But I always remembered you all at home and kept myself intact.
When people of my age were wasting their youth in drugs I was working in a construction of a bridge as a labor, and when they were still wasting their life I was choosing new clothes for you. Life paid me well for my dedication and now I am a teacher with a respectable life.
Now you are about that age and today on your birthday I am writing you this note just to let you know that you will never have to work for a construction site nor you should worry about buying any thing for home because I have made it all set. All you have to do now is to know that your life is a gift and prepare yourself enough to be capable of cherishing it. Make us proud by being the best that you are capable of. I will be the happiest man when I see you lead a comfortable life.

Sleeping on the Wall

My friend CK Gurung (I call him my friend but he was a teacher of someof my teachers) is not so lazy when it comes to his work but you should not be suprised if you see him sleeping on the wall with the whole school singing the national anthem beside him.

My Forbidden Arm- an inerasable repentance

I read this news of a Russian girl with 54 stars tattooed on her face; thank god I have it on my arms. But mine are not ordinary arms that could be hidden under the sleeves of my shirts; mine are a teacher’s arms that are meant to lead.

I still feel the pricking pleasure of the needle pecking my skin ten years ago, the joy of having it done, and the pride of showing it off. Then I didn’t know my future. Life had this respectable future set aside in a surprise box and didn’t even give me a clue of what I deserved to be.

Three years as teacher now, I can no more hide my arm from the thousand curious eyes. My childhood pleasure has taken a sharp turn-It has given me a forbidden arms.

My wife always insists that I should wear a full sleeve shirt or a jacket while we have guest or while going out. She justifies that she does not want people to get an impression of me just by my tattooed arms. Irritated, sometimes I cry out to her, “I don’t care what people think of me .Those who know me don’t care about the tattoo”. But at back of my mind I realize that it matters. Bhutan is still innocent and tattoo still contradicts it culture.

When I look at my left arm filled with tattoo I laugh at how stupid I had been. As a young boy being naughty is unavoidable, which as we grow time forgives .But what have I done? Even time is helpless. Had I written on a stone “I am Naughty” I could have sand it off but I have done it on my skins, to last so long as I live.

The Russian girl has sued the tattooist for £10,000. Whom shall I sue? My stupidity? My childhood? I am undergoing a non-bail-able sentence of my own trial. There exists some laser technology to remove tattoo in developed countries which is but too far and too expensive. The Russian girl will have to pay $10,000 to undergo the surgery, which is equivalent to my seven years’ salary.

My students stare at my arms in sheer curiosity and pleasure. I can’t hide it completely from them. They are not disgusted by my tattoo and that gives me added fear. Students learn from what a teacher does far more than what he says. I am afraid I may have to go on paying higher price for a silly boyhood pleasure.

My schooldays friends loved my tattoo, they would ask me to do for them too. I had tattooed so many of them. They were happy and would take me on lavish treats. Time has changed me and so must my friends, they must hate me now, but I know I am paying the heaviest price. I am a teacher. My friends here pass different comments on different days on the same tattoo and I have nothing to defend myself but some word of apology. The same apology goes to everybody who would ever see me with my tattoo.

Inspirational View

Look at what I see from my veranda. What more inspiration do I want to relax and write master pieces.

This view is from the back side of my house, which totally contradicts the front side view with all the parking problem, drunkards, constructions, garbage problem, potholes and dusty wind.

I Let My Wife Leave Her Job, and didn't let her regret...

We had lived apart for over two years after marriage and I thought that was too enough. But coming together could cost us a job, hers or mine. Mine we agreed was more secure being a government one, but what about hers? Well it was hard to agree upon, without having a promising option waiting. Hers was equally decent though private owned and she had a lovely workplace. She had too many good friends to leave behind unlike me, who was just an alien in Bajo yet.

Her friends knew me far lesser than she did so they had all sorts of suspicions; they shared the stories of so many new marriages being broken and women being left helpless. Her plan shocked many of them. After a while even I got myself soaked in doubt. What if somehow our marriage failed, would she find her way back? I have seen so many innocent girls being ripped of their jobs for their love only to fill their lives with tears. I knew deep down that I was not going to make her regret. That was just one side of the issue, while the other still waited for answer.

She was a working woman with habit of shopping for cosmetics, walking into beauty parlors, and dinning in good restaurants at the end of the month. Could I with my dry salary afford to treat her with her womanly basics alongside the regular household expenses and rents and clothing and so on? She may not ask for all these understanding my stand but how could I let her live a life full of silly sacrifices when I had confidently and promisingly led her off her good working life.

I suffered all these fearful energy running through my body. I couldn’t discuss the issue with my dear mother even. I had made all the choices so far and should put up with what comes hence forth. As of my wife she trusted me enough to let me think us out. And there I had made the righteous choice.

I proposed a business prospective in Wangdue. We talked it over days. Many ideas we discussed and evaluated. Cloth wholesale could run well but who will frequent the long road to and fro supplier? Same with the grocery shop and also cosmetics, in which she has greater knowledge actually. We put forward many ideas and crumble them off, as Abraham Lincoln says, “If I have six hours to fell a tree I would spend five hours in sharpening the axe.” We did right that.

Finally, this bold idea of Video Game parlor seemed right for us. We called it bold because in this we only have to worry about the initial investment. Then updating the games is necessary, which means some pieces of CDs. I did a rough estimation of how much we could earn in a month and pleasantly the worst case scenario gave me Nu.30,000 per month, which is more than three times my salary-in-hand.

I went to the bank for loan, and there I met many of my friends applying for vehicle loan. I envied them but I knew I had my priorities in order. I invested just about a hundred thousand in five sets of PlayStation consoles and TV screens. She resigned and we moved together. For more than two months the gaming sets laid in our storeroom. It was a long fearful moment with the loan adding up its interest and we waiting for a vacant shop to start up.

My wife grew pessimist by the day but I didn’t lose faith. In due course I designed the furniture and the signboard.

Exactly the day I was done we got a vacant room in Bajothang, some minute walk from where we live. And we began our business. It was a blast. It attracted young and old alike. We got our names, PlayStation uncle and PlayStation Aunty. When we oversleep on Sunday we would have kids knocking on us to come to shop. On weekdays she could have the whole morning for herself. In evening rush-hour I would go to help her with tea and snacks, and wait for my chance to play. Since I play a lot I discover lots of tricks in the games and kids beg me to teach them. Well I do that and attract more of them. Some kids come there daily and spend hours watching the fortunate ones, so I let them play for free some times.

After a month in the business my wife told me once, “You know, I feel the freedom kissing me. I can walk to the shop at my own time in my own comfortable garments, sit there and watch kids play and get paid. If I want to take rest I can just close the shop and walk back home without having to write an application of leave. And look, at the end of the month I have got more than four times my salary to count.” This was more than what I wanted to hear from my wife. She was happy and so I am.

The last December completed six and a half months since we opened our shop. We have recovered the initial investment besides our luxurious daily and monthly shopping. And last May we paid up the loan which was actually for fifty five months. Then I have applied for vehicle loan and now I drive a car and I still have the shop like the hen that lay golden egg.

I have everything a normal man wants in life; car, computer, laptop, Plasma TV, washing machine, refrigerator, sofa set, luxury bed, and a happy wife. I am not showing off my property here, in fact what I have doesn’t even qualify to be called as property but I am just trying to make a point that I have not let my wife down by let her leave her job for me. It’s all about one informed decision in life.

I am on Tshering Tobgay's Blog

Opposition Leader Tshering Tobgay keeps a blog, of course everybody knows it, but I knew it somewhere in May this year. I had 12 blogs since 2006, and never thought I would go crazy over them some day. Only when I started reading Tshering Tobgay's blog regularly I came to know that there are lots of Bhutanese blogger. Some of them were featured on his blogs ever since. When you read my blog you will see that only this year I have taken it seriously. All thanks to the man. He has great duties to fulfill for our country yet I am amazed by his thoughtfulness in taking time out and inspiring us by featuring new comers and not-so-common blogger on his widely-read blog.
This time it's me with some friends and I am humbled when I saw my picture there. Thank you so much for motivating me. I will make your effort worthwhile.

Bhutan Window- did you buy one?

You did it, Bhutan Today! For those of you who didn't know yet Bhutan Window is the inaugural issue of Bhutan Today’s seasonal magazine. I am reading it now. I never left any book I read un-reviewed therefore I shall give my piece of mind on this in my later post. For now I am going to review the Bhutanese mindset on Bhutanese books.

That shop in Wangdue town must hate me for coming every evening asking the same thing, “Did the magazine arrive?” perhaps I must have inspired her, now she has it on her shelf. However, Having it on the shelf is one thing and collecting dust on the shelf is another.

The editor of the magazine is a good friend of mine and I am given to sell some copies for him. But I didn’t know I would have to beg some buyers before they could open their purse for Nu.90. They just look at the thickness of the book and compare with the cost. I have to tell them that it is not telephone directory. Some scream at the price. But there are a golden few who brighten up instantly and embrace it.

I once visited DSB books shop, where I am told my teacher Karma Padey’s book Ta She Ga Cha- Broken Saddle is the best seller. Curious, I asked how much they sold. I didn’t imagine a million though but I did put my guess at about a hundred thousand copies before he could answer- four hundred!

There are just a countable many Bhutanese books in the market, mostly self-published out of sheer love for writing ( I am proud to tell that I have a copy each of every one of them), and many good stories are still residing in the hard disk of some computers. Who will publish them? Why even publish them? After all who will buy them?

Some of us cannot read at all, some of us would not read, some of us cannot buy, some of us would not buy, some of us can read and also buy but like borrowing more, only a precious some of us buy and read. If at all many of us will buy Bhutanese books, then many publishers will come up to give break to many writers and among the many writers we might come across great writers. Actually it is simple, it starts with you; did you buy a copy of Bhutan Window? Look at Bhutan Time’s Bhutan Now magazine, it’s now never. Let’s save Bhutan Window. Let’s make it a point to buy a copy of each Bhutanese book in the market, for diamonds are found in rock and only a million rocks gives out a diamond.

Singaproean Curry- I can like it!

It's been over six months now and Mr. Kong Ming is still having hard time finding "eatable" food in Bhutan. He has been to restaurants that serve Chinese food to find Bhutanese versions. I have taken him to best hotels in the town just to displease him at the end. Many friends invited him for dinner and no one could impress him enough, just because he is as honest as one could be. But how much ever honest he may be I am worried he will go back home a skeleton.

May be it's not the same with all Singaporeans, but Kong likes less sugar, less salt and less oil in everything he eats. Where would he find such food in here? Wherever he goes he is treated as special guest and thus served with best tea and best dishes- and you know what we call the best! Come on he even finds Pepsi and Coca Cola too sweet to consume. Mineral Water alone keeps him alive.

Kong likes food at my place, wait, wait I mean it. He would drop in every evening, as long as he is in our school, for dinner. My wife can cook the food he likes. Actually it is simple, just cook something really bad, something you would usually serve an ulcer or diabetic patient. He says "I am not crazy about food", but I find him crazy!

Well this time he brought a packet of soup sent to him right from Singapore. Of course it is like the "stone soup" story. You require pork ribs. The soup is boiled and the ribs are added in it to be cooked for 30 mins. Then ready! He lend his hand in preparing and so sweetly he did the serving that night. He ate like hell. I liked it too. I mean I can like it!

Tell me It's Not True!

When I was a little boy my mother used to warn me, "to stay away from the road, and play among friends of large group. Do not accept any goodies from unknown persons and not to go to them if they call you. They could be from a big construction site. They take you away and cut your head and put it in the foundation of their structure to keep away from evil."

As life went on many truth from childhood happens to be just another fairy tale, but this cutting-head-for-construction truth remained, maginified with stories from different people and places. I am in the middle of believing and not beliveing it. There seem to be no logic in it. Please somebody, tell me it's not true!

Speeding Up Your Computer- Some Tips

Well here am I with the post I have promised, but sure it isn't going to be so big as I thought because Mr. Kong's checklist is meant for making up a good client computer on a network, meaning much of the options on the computers are disabled (something you won't like).

Try a few of the following tips and see if they appeal you enough. I am impressed though.

Right-click My Computer > Properties > Advanced > Performance Settings... > Visual Effects > Adjust for best performance (This removes most of Windows XP's bells and whistles and greatly improves performance.); and then

Advanced > Virtual Memory > System Managed size > Set > OK > OK (Click No to restart.)(This enables Windows to manage its own Virtual Memory for low memory systems.)

Right-click Desktop > Properties > Desktop > No picture > Black background Screen saver > (None) screen saver or 'Blank' Appearance > Effects > Uncheck all except "Use the following method to smooth edges of screen font" Settings > Resolution > 1024 × 768 pixels for 17" monitor. Colors set to 16 bit. (Removing desktop wallpaper and reducing colour depth reduces video memory use (usually taken from main RAM)) Click Apply. Advanced Settings... > Set font size to 120% (for better word clarity on 17" monitor) > OK > OK (Click No to restart.)

Start > Run... > "msconfig" > Boot.ini > Click /NOGUIBOOT and Timeout = 3 seconds.

Now restart Windows XP. There will be a blank screen for a while because no graphics is loaded.

After Windows XP is logged on, uncheck the remainder.

Try these also!

Open My Computer > Right click on C: hard drive> Properties > Uncheck "index drive for faster searching" Do the same for all hard drives.

On My Computer > Tools > Folder Options > View > Uncheck "Automatically search for network ..." (This speeds up opening Windows Explorer and browser.)

Right click My Computer > Manage > Services and Applications > Services > Server > (Right click) Properties > Startup Type = Disabled. (This disables File and Print sharing on the workstation. Saves RAM if you are not sharing files/printers on this workstation.)

Control Panel > Sound Settings > Sound Scheme = No Sounds. (This removes Windows sounds (however, the computer can still play music).

Control Panel > Security Settings > Disable Automatic Windows Updating. (This reduces unnecessary internet traffic. Keep one or two fast computers to 'set to notify'.)

Control Panel > Remove Windows Components > Remove all unnecessary components (e.g. Games, Accessories except Calculator and Paint, MSN, Networking, Outlook Express, Messenger) (This removes unnecessary Windows components. You can remove IE if you are planning to install Firefox. However, if you remove IE, you cannot use Windows Update from the workstation.)

Restart

In addition have you used CCleaner software? Well this does magic in fixing registry errors, and remove temporary and deleted files (you know deleted files still occupy space in your hard drive.) Just download this 3.2 MB software and install; it is very easy to use.

And what about Disk Defragmentation? You did it before? Well this process that is there in your computer, which will arrange the files in your computer memory thereby freeing a lot of space.

Finally, I bet you know this: Antivirus! You must have one installed on your computer. Will two do better? More than one is as good as not having or worse! So just have one. Update it as required. Never let anybody open there storage devices in your computer without scanning. Sometimes you have to be unkind.

Post Card from Around the World

Well this time it is from Singapore. My teacher Ms. Loh, yes a Singaporean, makes sure that I receive a post card from her on every important occasion and from every country she travels to. I have her card from China, India, Russia, England, Paris, Hongkong …I forgot some of them now. It is funny that the receiving end’s address never changes, I am forever fixed here. Something great about her is that she doesn’t mind me not replying.

The card this time is meant for the Independence Day of her country 9^th August though it seems to taken 23 days to reach me. I asked about 9^th August to Mr. Kong and he laughed. He didn’t realize at all amidst his travel and troubleshooting.

Ms. Loh was my lecturer in Paro College of Education 2004 to 2005. She was a great teacher. She still believes that post cards are better than email.

Note: Apologies for not post the tips for speeding up computer right away, just because this one seemed more exciting at the moment as I hold her card.

Let’s call it a day!

The whole day I was with computer and usually by now I would have long gone into slumber but you know when something is achieved you want to try your luck on another. Infact today I achieved more than just something. Mr. Kong Ming was on his fourth (may be fifth) visit to our school. Precisely he is a volunteer from Singapore working in the MoE for Bhutan WIRED Project sponsored by his government. He was actually our facilitator but necessity made him a great computer troubleshooter.

This morning we began our work on setting a domain server which is meant to connect the five member schools, Bajothang HSS, Drukgyel HSS, Chukha HSS, Punakha HSS and ChumgangLSS with MoE to share resources on the new teaching method (the soul of the project). However, there were million things to be done before we could actually begin;

· The Operating systems (Windows Xp) must be upgraded to SP 3 (Sp 3 Patch is 316 MB and requires 24 hours to download, god! What is wrong with the Broadband?)
· Windows Xp must be the Professional Edition (not Home Edition) (Gosh, many of the computers are installed with the Home edition; each reformatting process takes about an hour)
· The Internet browser should be Firefox (of course this is not so hard)
· The computer must have good Antivirus software (Where do we get good antivirus in Bhutan? Well Symantec is there, pirated though just like all other software)
· And the worst of all was, the computer speed must be good and that takes the most of the energy…I think I will give the whole chunk of tips to speed up your computer in my next post

• The actual server setting can be done only after a few days it seems...

Mr. Kong skipped his lunch and didn’t mind missing the dinner but I did. I often reminded him, “Let call it a day” It was he who deserved rest and he did seem to want it. By and by we stumbled on hundred problems and made me a better computer man (well I am thought of as a computer repairer in the area) and the best part was the speeding-up-computer tips, of which Kong has already made a checklist (I will really make it in my next post; I do have his permission) When we finally came out of the computer lab it was dark and raining. It had never occurred to me that there is such great charm in calling it a day after sweating myself to death and coming alive out of it with lot of thing to keep for a life time…it didn’t end there though…we continued more troubleshooting after dinner on my computer…ha ha ha my eyes are aching so bad I think let’s really call it a day!

Crocodile Sighting in Wangdue

Of course the picture of crocodile here is from google and photoshop brought it to Wangdue but there are rumor of sighting of crocodile in the Punatshangchu. I wonder if it can survive in the chilly glacier water but people say once there was a group of them in Punakha, later washed away by the '94 flood. Thus, there is a possibility.

The Indian labourers seem to have seen it.

So far it existence is not confirmed and it has not posed any threat to lives of people and animal but if it is really there then it is necessary for everybody to know. The concern body, perhaps RSPN should confirm it and take necessary precautions to safe the reptile from people and people from the reptile. Meanwhile I am always ready with the camera, let's see if I am lucky enough to be the first to photograph it without being eaten.

More than Spiderman

My son Jigme is just 14. He is a super footballer; I know he will play for our country one day. But what I didn't know about him was; back from school he came straight to and made me promise that I won't share with anybody about what he was going to tell me,

"Promise dad?"

"promise"

"Are you sure about your promise?"

"Yes, I cross my heart and hope to die,"

He then came close to my ear and whispered, " I am Spiderman!"

There are many a moments in my days when he reminds me to laugh with his wit. I know he is not a spiderman, he is more than that! I don't know what he will bring home today, everyday is a surprise with this boy!

Gifting me my Lost Dream

Eight years ago, I proudly walked the gate of Kuensel for my first “Best Story of the Month” certificate. That was just the beginning of the long road. The next month I saw my name again. I had been unkind to Writing then; from the prize money I bought watercolor and brushes. I was appreciated more for my paintings those days. Of all the prizes for poem, short story and paintings that followedI was moved by the “Best Short Story Writer of the Year” award Drukgyel school gave me. I changed my dream. I wanted to become a writer. I used to say, my dreams may change me but I won’t change my dream.

By the end of another year I had completed 30 short stories, edited them over hundred times, and kept them aside for publishing. I designed a cover for the book, wrote the introduction, even the acknowledgement. Everything had to be edited over years…many names changed in my acknowledgement. Perhaps there are none now.

How many stories you have finished by now? If someone asks me this question, my answer is: 30. I never wrote again. It’s not that I gave up so quick, I had to give up eventually. I went from publisher to publisher, printing press to government agency with no money in my pocket. I finished several shoe soles to return disappointed every night. Everybody promised me something and none did anything actually. They say it is not profitable. I even said I want no money out of that!

I spent thousands in printing manuscript and binding them for submission and many of the publishers have a copy with them, may be not anymore (they may not know that I spent all my pocket money on those). What left me disheartened and discouraged is not that they didn’t accept it but they rejected without even reading a story. I know it is not my fault at all but why to write in a place where even publishers can’t read.

Thus, I lost my dream…

But dreams die hard. My friends and teachers from good times regard me as a writer, thank you so much, even if I am far from it. Sometimes I run into strangers who tell me that they read my story or poem and express how good I am, thank you for the pleasant surprises, in those brief moments you reminded me of something great. And most of all, my friend Nagwang never leaves me alone, just as Kezang Namgyel is. They squeeze stories out of me with their good intentions. I owe these two guys my best dream. Thank you for gifting me my lost Dream.

Burglary on the Rise; Police taking forever to bring them down

Perhaps people would blame it on the unemployment crisis but thirty years from now almost no one was employed. Everyone earned their own living with what is possible with their honest ability and toil. Then youths were considered pure and innocent. What has happened now?

Villages are deserted with fertile lands deprived of farmers and people are roaming the streets of confused towns where they are unwanted. Towns themselves are filled with half-satisfied and I-want-more people how can they treat you good?

Once people used to say, “Don’t send your children to Thimphu, that place spoils them.” And it is the otherwise now or may be it always was, “Don’t send you children to Thimphu; they are spoiling the beautiful Town.”

It was never dreamt of that an ancient town like Wangdue could be infested with wasted children; threat to themselves for sure but threat to society. Leave aside those long-hair-red-eye boys hanging out in the evenings and picking up fights, Wangdue has serial Burglar at large.

There are different categories of thieves, those after car tyre and fuel and those that break into shops and houses for money and gold. What was happening in Phuntsholing sometime ago is now here in Wangdue. Police may have received about hundred complains of burglary of similar nature within this one year and they are still far from catching the culprit. Sometimes I feel if I am given the contract to hunt down this group of youth I can give a deadline. But deadline for police seems forever.

Fact File:

1. They seem to have a cutting device to smoothly break the lock without much sound (no sound was heard by the neigbhours nor the broken-locks are left behind)
2. They keep track of who goes on vacation (they always strike the right house)
3. They are only after money and gold (Not even laptops are taken from the houses they broke in)
4. They wear gloves (no finger prints are ever left behind)
5. They drink (they have taken wine from several houses)
6. They take their own time (they break open every single lockers and drawers)

My conclusion:

They are a group of youth with no work. They are into drugs, drinking and smoking for which they need money. They are inspired by their initial success and are now carrying on with better ideas like gloves and iron-cutters. They are careful about not taking the things which can be used against them as tracking device.

Million Dollar Question:

Why are they still at large and successfully operating week after week for years when police has all the clues and suspects?

Obituary

Four days after the tragedy, some eyes are still full of tears. I may be among the many who still couldn't believe it at all. When I close my eyes to sleep I see roaring river rumbling downstream, hardly letting me sleep. I watch TV until sleep comes over me. Three days we were along the river but we still couldn't recover his body... Now finally we search no more and perhaps we consider him alive among us, for if he is dead we must have his body...

Sigay- Our beloved

(11.11.1990 to 01.08.2009)

We deeply mourn the sudden and untimely demise of our dear friend, student and brother Sigay who left us on the afternoon of August 1st 2009. We pray for his soul and may god bless his family with strength to over come the lose.

Bajo School Family

Tragedy in Bajo

Death is inevitable, we accept, but when it comes in a life of a young boy I lose faith in god. Sigay is a class XI science boy. This afternoon he had gone for a dip in the punatshangchhu along with two of his friends; none a good swimmer. Before long he has disappeared into the muddy river. It breaks my heart to think what must have been his plan after the cool dip for the sunny Saturday afternoon?

Sigay has made his parents proud last winter and may be they are counting on him ever more, but here we are searching along the Punatshangchhu bank for his body- may be we would not get it even. What are we to tell his parents? God, what will come over them when they hear that their son has drowned?

While he was among us he was just another boy but now as he goes everybody is after him, whole Wangdue is talking about him: how he was? what he said in the morning? how is he in studies? More so all his teachers, friends, high officials and arm forces who has never known him are scanning the river bank for him. For the world just another boy is dead but for For him and his family the whole world has ended. I pray for his soul and hope god give his family strength to overcome the cruel fate.

Students in Love

On my way to town last Sunday, I saw Sangay walking with Chokey with some other friends following them some distance apart. Sangay already had a girl friend from class nine, god know what he’s doing with Chokey. Maybe it was just a walk together.

Yesterday, while I was monitoring their work on JavaScript I saw Sangay’s left arm bearing Chokey’s name in fresh wound. When the class was over I caught hold of his arm and asked what it was all about. But what I didn’t realize was Chokey’s class was coming in for their HTML lesson. The coincidence left both thoroughly blushed.

That evening I called on sangay to tell him not to make his love bloody, and also to ask what happen to his little girl friend from class nine. I held his arm to see that Chokey’s name was buried under fresh wound. He showed me a letter from her saying she has lost faith in him and that she returning to her ex-boyfriend.

I really wanted to sort out things for them and teach them lessons on love but I am their teacher and what I am doing is against the school rules and may be against the mindset of my colleagues. Students are here to learn and not for honeymoon. If people knew I knew about their affair and left it without any disciplinary action against them I may be questioned. And what If school knew I know many such cases?

Well I am an individual and I have the right to exercise my own principles. In fact I may question them instead. Students are here to learn what is required for living. What are they going to do with algebra? Or why should they know about world war? What can they do with their knowledge of chemical reactions? We don’t teach them what they exactly require in life. All of them will once marry, so we must teach them the value of love, faith, and ways to sort out problems in relationship.

Schools treat love affairs as illegal relations and thus never allow it in anyway, so a graduate comes out of college with no idea on how to deal with his first date, how to keep love alive in a relationship, how to propose for marriage, how to care for ones pregnant wife, … Divorce is on the rise! Is there something wrong in their schooling?

Bhutanese Rescue Service

The news of seven boys in Chukha was shocking, it was only shocking until I knew they were washed away after hours of hanging on to life and before the eyes of their parents and police and the Dzongda. Deep inside I feel strongly that if I was there I could have rescued some of them, may be... But we can imagine the reality there, pitch dark night, fading torch, roaring river, nylon rope, and terrified children 30 feet away.

There may be many with my set of notion but how can we blame the people who were there? In fact they were there and we should be thankful, if at all being present is enough. Elsewhere in the world they have helicopters to rescue a cow and here seven children were hanging on to a nylon rope of their lives. Perhaps it is time for action; do Bhutan have a rescue team? or is it just the 113; normal people with normal ability without punctuality.

It it our share to cry, our heart to pray, our work to offer butter lamp and our right and duty to cast votes; Prime Minister, ministers and MP should not waste time doing variety shows, you all are placed there to ACT. Learn from mistakes and history, don't cry over them. Give us an extraordinary set of rescue men like those in the west (West is not always bad).